You must have just watched American Experience about Eugene O'Neill on PBS. I don't know about his plays on-line, but check the Samuel French website...if there is one...and you may be able to get them at less than bookstore prices....you can also now get the transcript of the PBS show at PBS.ORG...I have excerpted this monologue for you from LONG DAY'S JOURNEY INTO NIGHT:
"I was on The Squarehead, square rigger, bound for Buenos Aires. Full moon in the Trades. The old hooker driving fourteen knots. I lay on the bowsprit, facing astern, the water foaming into spume under me, the masts with every sail white in the moonlight, towering high above me. I became drunk with the beauty and singing rhythm of it, and for a moment I lost myself, actually lost my life. I was set free! I dissolved in the sea, became white sails and flying spray, became beauty and rhythm, became moonlight and the ship and the high dim-starred sky! I belonged, without past or future, within peace and unity and a wild joy, within something greater than my own life, or the life of Man, to life itself! To God, if you want to put it that way. And several other times in my life, when I was swimming far out, or lying alone on a beach, I have had the same experience, became the sun, the hot sand, green seaweed anchored to a rock, swaying in the tide. Like a saint's vision of beatitude. Like the veil of things as they seem drawn back by an unseen hand. For a second you see, and seeing the secret, you are the secret. For a second there is meaning! Then the hand lets the veil fall and you are alone, lost in the fog again, and you stumble on towards nowhere for no good reason. It was a great mistake, my being born a man, I would have been much more successful as a sea gull or a fish. As it is, I will always be a stranger who never feels at home, who does not really want and is not really wanted, who can never belong, who must always be a little in love with death."
I would love to discuss O'Neill with you but I have been up all night...(it has been a long night's journey into day for me...)...Hopefully I can come back and add to this after I've caught up with myself.
In the meanwhile, good luck and do pick up the transcript from the show.